It was a Saturday morning like any other, isn't that how every story begins? The only difference is after my PT client I usually teach a class. That particular Saturday I chose to move it to Sunday since it would just be me recording it anyways. This is one of the small things that kept me alive although it would be a series of "coincidences" from here on out. I decided instead to go to a boxing class at RUMBLE. I had taken a class the week before and felt an old part of myself come back as I hit that bag with all the boxing muscle memory that I have. So I walked to class talking to my mom on the phone ab0out bread making ...i mean riveting. Let me add that I don't remember anything of this going forward. I apparently take the class to the end when you get the last minute to free style but I \ was instead laying on the floor. Outside a girl who had never taken a class before was waiting to go in the next one, convinced only the night before by her friend to give it a try. Here is the bigger thing that kept me alive. This girl who also wouldn't have ordinarily been there was an EMT.
Once the instructor realized I was not in fact stretching but rather not breathing, she was called and performed 5 minutes of CPR and one round of defibrillation in order to get me breathing again. Just enough to get me in an ambulance where I had my second cardiac arrest and was again revived with another round of defibrillation.
I arrived at the hospital awake, scared and unable to recognize anyone around me. The gym for reasons unknown had called the bar I work instead of my case of emergency but from there everyone was called. Evidently I at this point ripped out all my wires, clothes and anything else I could get a hold of while yelling NO and PLEASE.
After several more seizures and being in and out of consciousness I finally opened my eyes at 2am and looked at my partner who asked me if I knew his name. I did. He asked if I knew my dogs name. I did. I was back.
In the coming days I heard my story from several view points of my closest people in my life, including the part where doctors had warned them that I may be brain dead. What hearing that must have been like, I have no idea. I feel deeply for them as I could not imagine being told that ab0ut any of them.
I wasn't entirely aware of what had happened when I woke up. Your mom is coming they said? Why, was she supposed to come? My answer. It wasn't until a day or two that I truly realized what my body went through and how lucky I am that all the coincidences fell into place.
Wednesday I had surgery to install an enormous defibrillator that sticks out like a breast on my back. What I remember of that is my surgeon telling me I would be half awake and that we would sing. I woke up as I was being stitched up to PINK very loud singing Just give me a reason and i started singing along. That song will forever be engrained in my memory as more than just a drunk karaoke song.
So here I am a week post surgery. Home. Unable to do much. I try not to complain about how I'm only allowed one cup of coffee a day compared to my usual 4. I try not to complain that I cannot work out and get my happy endorphins that I have grown to rely on. I try not to complain at all. I am alive because of a few coincidences that happened when they needed to. I do not believe in God but I believe in the universe and the universe made sure everyone was where they were supposed to be that day.
I have a long road ahead to recover and will now live with the knowledge that this could happen again. I'll just be better equipped this time. I most likely have what 4 of my cousins have and that is Brugada Syndrome. I hereditary heart condition that can result in sudden cardiac arrest. Nothing can be done or could have been done to stop it prevent it.
We spend so much time in life focused on small things. Small unimportant things. We complain about our weight or this and that is wrong with our bodies but in the end it's not about how we look on the outside but rather how are bodies work on the inside. They are keeping us alive as we bitch about them. Every time you work out and want to stop, think, how lucky am I that I can do this? Every time you don't like the number on the scale remember how trivial it all is. Your body is amazing because it keeps you moving throughout the day, it lets you breathe. It allows you to do all the things you take for granted and never consider until it stops doing it. Treat your body with respect and love and be grateful. Other cheesy things to follow...
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